A Boy's Paradise
by DCHeesegirl
Summary: A BOY goes to a GIRL's camp. He's an outcast and almost started a school shooting. Will he find his refuge? Might change to R later on.


DUN-DUN-DUN-DUUUUUUUUUUUUUN! A revolution has occurred! A story about a BOY going to a GIRL'S camp! 'Nuff said. Just read.

* * *

Ferdinand McDonald was somewhat of a dork. His wardrobe consisted of tucked-in plaid shirts with khaki pants drawn up over his waist. His hair was neatly parted in the middle and he had shiny braces on his teeth.

However, he wasn't the type of guy that would sit around with random people and bore them with talk about Yu-gi-oh and what-not. He didn't talk to anyone. He was bitter. Girls would avoid him, boys would laugh and give him wedgies, and teachers would shake their heads in pity when they saw him.

Basically, everyone thought he was a freak. But he was going to change all that. Oh, yes, how he would change all that. He would make sure no one could humiliate him again...

He showed up late for school. On the way to his first class, some jocks came along and tried to stuff him in his locker. A couple of them snatched his backpack away and began dumping the contents onto the floor, scattering books, papers...

...and a pistol.

"Shit." One of them yelped. They all backed away as he grabbed the pistol and pointed it at them.

Suddenly, he was hit in the back of the head with something hard and blacked out immediately, crumpling to the floor.

* * *

"Ferdinand Magellan—er—McDonald, please rise."

When he failed to rise straight away, he was roughly pulled up to his feet by the guard.

"Is it true that you threatened fellow classmates with an armed pistol?"

"Yes." He said.

"Was there any serious reason why?"

"They were assaulting me." He said. "I was defending myself."

"Objection." A clear voice echoed through the empty court room. Everyone turned to look at the speaker. It was one of the jocks' lawyers. "Permission to speak?" The judge nodded wearily.

"According to my client, this boy attacked them while they were simply walking down the hall." There were mutters as the jury talked amongst each other. Ferdinand cursed silently.

"This court has been called to recess." The judge said. Everyone immediately began talking. Ferdinand sat in his seat and stared as the lawyer passed by him with a smirk. There was no way out for him...

The court had resumed, but Ferdinand didn't take in a word of it. One of the jocks had been called up to the bench. He didn't need to listen to any of it. He was trapped and he knew it. He felt it with every word that came from the jock's mouth.

Before he knew it, he was called to rise.

"Ferdinand McDonald, you have two choices. You could have a cell already prepared for you in jail, or there is a detention camp just south of El Paso. It's your choice." The judge said, staring down his spectacles at him. Ferdinand was slightly relieved, but also apprehensive. He wondered if detention camp would be any better than being behind bars. He took a deep breath as he plunged into the unknown.

"I choose detention camp."

"A year at camp should do it." The judge said in a corn-pony voice as he slammed down his gavel.

* * *

There was nothing around them but desert. It was a barren wasteland, save for a few cacti and desert animals. Ferdinand sweated profusely in the leather seat of the bus as it bustled down the highway. He was wearing just a regular shirt with regular jeans, and a regular hairdo. He didn't want to make his life at camp as hectic as life at school. He watched the driver fumble over the map a few times and occasionally saw a wrinkle appear between his eyebrows. Ferdinand wondered why they hadn't hired a guard to look after him. He could've just gone up behind the man and choked him. He decided not to, however, since they were in the middle of nowhere.

Hours later, they were bumping along down a dusty road towards a camp compound.

* * *

The first thing he noticed was the peach trees. Bunches of them grew near the small lake that was located in the middle of the camp. There were several tents erected in rows and beside it was a row of high walled showers. The bus pulled up in front of a cabin that was labeled "Caretaker." A woman that had long brown hair and sunglasses was standing outside waiting. The bus driver opened the door and the woman walked up the steps.

"Here are two water bottles for the road." She said to the driver.

"Thank you, ma'am." The old man said, tipping his hat. The woman turned and gasped a little.

"A boy..."

Ferdinand sat in the air conditioned cabin as the woman talked with someone on the phone.

"What do you mean, no buses can come until January? His sentence will be over by then!" The woman yelled irritably into the receiver. "Stay?!...Well, I guess that's our only option. Thank you. Bye." Sighing, she hung up and then turned to Ferdinand.

"Welcome to Camp Laguna Verde, sister camp of Camp Green Lake. I'm Denise Bishop, but everyone here calls me Dizzy. Er...while you are here, you will dig five foot holes each day. Come with me, I'll show you where you'll be staying." He followed Dizzy out to the row of tents. All of them were big enough to accommodate at least eight people. She led him into the second tent. There were seven cots with a crate beside each one. Three girls were sitting on the floor in front of a cot, talking. They looked up and froze.

"Yo, Dizzy." A girl with braids said, looking at Ferdinand oddly. "Wuzz goin' on?"

"This is Ferdinand McDonald. He'll be staying, um...here in this tent with you bunch. You don't mind, do you?" Dizzy said, casting Ferdinand a nervous side glance.

"Nah, it's aight." The girl said.

"Oh, good. Show him around, please. I'll be back with his uniform in a few." Dizzy left the tent. The girls looked him over.

"Ferdinand, huh?" The girl with braids said. He nodded and stuffed his hands in his pockets.

"I'm Twist. The blonde over there is Goldie, and shorty over here is Bling. There's three others, but they're still digging." As Twist was talking he took time to look over each of the girls. Twist was African-American and had over a dozen black braids. She was fit and slim. He could tell she was the leader. Goldie had blonde hair pulled into a messy bun. She smiled at him in a way that made him uncomfortable. It was like he was the first guy she had seen in years. He quickly looked to Bling. She had long hair with crystal blue streaks. She was painting Twist's nails green, and had only looked up when he had first walked in.

"So, what were you sent here for?" Goldie asked, leaning back against the cot behind her.

"Pulled out a gun on some jocks." He said, sitting on a cot.

"Did you shoot?" Bling asked.

"No."

"Aw. See what I've been saying all week?" Bling said to Twist. "The legal system is so whack. He didn't hurt nobody, and they go off and send him here...to a girl's camp." She looked at him. "Are they sending guys with minor crimes to girl's camp now?"

"Nah, the judges just like me." He said. They laughed.

"Hey! I hear amusement! A voice said. A brown-haired girl wearing an army bandana charged into the tent. She stopped short when she saw Ferdinand.

"G-g-guy." She stuttered, pointing at him. He blinked, and then without warning, she ran up to him and punched him hard.

"Ow!" Ferdinand rubbed his arm.

"This one's real!" She yelled. Twist rolled her eyes.

"This is Loony. 'Nuff said." Twist said. Loony sat next to him and stared. He scooted away slightly.

"Are the others done yet?" Bling said, drying Twist's nails.

"They're coming." Loony said. About ten minutes later, two girls walked in.

"Wow. A BOY is sitting on my cot. It must be Christmas!" One girl said. She had sleek auburn hair and had many piercings in her ears.

"I'm Kitten. Rawr." She said, grinning. He smiled and then looked over at the other girl. She had black hair and he noticed a small diamond stud nose ring on the right side of her nose. She had a tattoo on her shoulder that had a guitar and under it read "Zinner."

"That's Slapdash over there. Dark princess of punk and all its punkyness. Woo." Bling said, lifting her arms in mock enthusiasm. Slapdash threw a hat playfully at Bling, and then grabbed some clothes and a towel out of her crate.

"I'm going to shower. Anyone that wants to watch can come." She said, walking out of the tent. Kitten mocked following her and then ran back to her cot, snickering.

"This is fun. Wee!" Kitten said, flopping down on her cot—or rather, on Loony and Ferdinand.

"OW! Get yer bony elbow off my knee!" Loony yelled, wrestling Kitten to the ground.

"DOGPILE!" Goldie yelled, throwing herself on the other two.

"PDA! PDA!" Bling said. Ferdinand watched, amused.

"The almighty powerful united girl forces ATTACK!" Loony yelled, jumping on Ferdinand along with Kitten. They were elbowing him mercilessly.

"Help! RAPE! RAPE!" He yelled, laughing. At that moment, Dizzy chose to walk in. She raised her eyebrows and then deposited Ferdinand's uniform on a cot before backing out of the tent. Everyone laughed.

RING!

"DINNER!" The girls chorused, and they bolted out the tent. Ferdinand followed slowly. When he entered the Mess Hall, it hushed immediately. Every eye was upon him. He took a tray and stood in line, but even the servers were staring at him. He looked around, slightly nervous.

"Um..." He stuttered. It was dead quiet. His face turned steadily redder.

"Yo." Twist said, looking around before talking to the servers. "What's the hold up here? Some people be wantin' some food!" Everyone shook out of their trance and went back to what they were doing. The noise level rose back to normal, but some kept glancing at Ferdinand. The line was moving again.

"Hey, boy! Over here!" Goldie said, waving him over when he had got his food. He sat between Goldie and Bling. Shortly after, Slapdash walked in with wet hair.

"What'd I miss?" She asked, sitting on the other side of Bling.

"Oh, nothing. Michael Jackson just came through doing the moonwalk." Bling said. Slapdash grinned and then stood up.

"THRILLERRRRRR!!" She sang, doing the zombie dance.

"UUGH! Sit down, ya gay!" Bling said, pulling Slapdash back down to the bench.

"Is your name really Ferdinand McDonald?" Loony asked him. He nodded slowly.

"Do...do you have a nickname?" Twist asked, twirling one of her braids.

"Not really." He said. "Why?"

"Well...Ferdinand is a really long name, so why don't we give you a nickname?" Twist said. He shrugged.

"How 'bout Ferdie?" Goldie asked.

"Ew! No! It sounds like Furby, and Furby is EVIL!" Loony said.

"What sorta stuff do you like?" Bling asked.

"Er...Punk music." He said.

"Let's call him Punk, then."

* * *

That's it for now. I need to refresh my brain. TA TAAAAA!! 


End file.
